Our Hearts Beat For Each Other:
by Rogue Schneider
Summary: Three people facing their own problems. Eren wants his sister to leave him alone. Mikasa doesn't know how to express her feelings towards him. And Jean keeps chasing after the girl he admires, even if she'll never like him. In the end, can they all find happiness? Or will some dreams remain forgotten forever. ErenxMikasa. Multi-shot. Rated T for some intimate scenes.
1. Your tears are my tears

**Our hearts beat for each other:**

 **Chapter 1:**

 **Your tears are my tears.  
**

Mikasa stared at the stars. They were beautiful. They sparkled in the night, and they reminded Mikasa of happier times.

She pressed her scarf to her face, inhaling the scent.

"Eren..."

It was him, the only person she ever wanted. And yet she always did something wrong, something to make his life difficult.

A tear traced it's way down her cheek.

Why did it have to be like this? They were so close to each other, yet so far.

She could understand why he always got annoyed. He didn't want her to protect him. He wanted to be the strong one, the one everyone depended on.

Sometimes, Mikasa just didn't get it. What was wrong with being the person who reached out for help? Why did Eren hate it so much.

Mikasa never wanted to be so strong, to be so good at everything. She _wanted_ to be the defenseless person. She wanted to be the frail, weak girl who could fall into his arms.

But her desires were unimportant.

 _'This is a cruel, world...'_

She stood up and stared at her hands.

 _'Cruel and beautiful...'_

She balled them into fists. There was no time for her to cry. Maybe Eren would hate her forever. Maybe Mikasa would never get a chance to tell him the truth- the truth she hid in the deepest recesses of her mind.

But she would protect him. Even if it killed her. Even if it broke her heart.

Because if there was one thing stronger than Mikasa's love for Eren, it was her desire to make sure he didn't die.

She took a step forward, but collapsed once again. Her resolve was simply too weak this time.

She buried her face in her arms and wept. Cried so badly her chest hurt.

Here, away from prying eyes, she could finally break down. Let her emotions loose.

She had fooled everyone. Even Eren. Physically, Mikasa may have been the strongest of the lot. But there was only so much her mind could take.

 _"I wish I hadn't saved you that day!"_

His words still stung her. And the worst part about them was that they were true. Eren would have been better off leaving her the way she was. When had she done _anything_ to make him happy?

Eren's greatest enemies were the Titans. The ones who had destroyed his life.

Mikasa had only one enemy. One she loathed with every fiber of her being. Hated with an intensity as strong as Eren's. Herself.

She found herself revolting. There was no place in the world for a person like her. A person who could do nothing right.

Frustrated, she walked up to a tree.

 _'I should be dead.'_

She smashed her fist, hard against the rough,wooden surface.

Again and again.

 _'I don't deserve to live.'_

Her knuckles were bruised and her hands had started to bleed.

The next second, someone had pulled her away.

She looked into his eyes. And she was disappointed.

It was Jean.

She sniffed and hastily wiped her tears.

"You're.. crying." He whispered. "You're hurting yourself."

Mikasa finally regained control.

"It's nothing." She replied, adopting her stoic mask once again.

"Bullshit!"

Jean had knelt down so he was facing her. His expression contorted and he balled his hands into fists.

"I heard what that bastard said. He's... He's fucking insane. And it's completely his fault. You don't need to punish yourself. "

Mikasa blinked. She never really understood why Jean tried to be so kind. He didn't have any obligation towards her.

Jean was shaking. Barely suppressing his rage.

"I'll break that asshole's neck one of these days!"

And suddenly, Mikasa pounced on him.

Jean found himself lying on the floor, with Mikasa on the top, her fist raised as if she was going to strike him.

" _Don't even think about it."_ She growled.

Jean stared at her, a sad smile on his face. Her dark, mesmerizing eyes, prominent cheek-bones, her cherry-red lips- they all made his heart beat faster.. Despite the dangerous look on her face, she looked so beautiful. So pure. Like an angel from the heavens.

"I understand if you want to hit me." He choked. "But that guy deserves it. He doesn't understand how lucky he is to have someone like you to protect him."

He brought a hand up and ran it threw her dark, smooth hair. But she pulled away, repulsed by his attitude.

"Do you think I'm worried about you?" She hissed at him. "Don't you realize that I wouldn't even bat an eyebrow if you died, as long as Eren was safe? That I don't care about you?"

Jean grimaced, and Mikasa knew her words had hurt him.

It wasn't true. Mikasa cared a lot for Eren, but that didn't mean that she didn't worry about her other team-mates.

Still, she was hoping that if she said something harsh to Jean, maybe he would stop liking her. Because she knew that all of his endeavors were pointless. No matter what happened, there was no way she would chose him over Eren.

Jean bowed his head down, his hair drooping over his eyes.

"I know." He whispered. "But I can't stop myself. I.. I adore you Mikasa. I don't want to see you cry."

And Mikasa felt her eyes growing hot again. She was trembling. She didn't understand him at all.

"Why don't you just leave me alone!" She cried out. "Do you enjoy expressing your feelings to someone when you know that they'll never give them back to you?"

Jean's breathing was heavier now.

"No." He replied. "It hurts. Really bad. But you're the same as me, Mikasa. We both care about people who'll never understand us."

"Eren saved my life-"

"AND SO DID I! Captain Levi, Me, the rest of the squad... We're all willing to risk our lives for you. And you don't understand how much everyone worries about you because you're so fucking into him!"

Mikasa was silent. She refused to meet his eyes.

"Leave me alone." She told him coldly. "You're not going to change my mind."

Jean turned and raced off into the distance, leaving Mikasa in the forest.

* * *

Jean's nails dug deep into his palms.

 _"_ _Do you enjoy expressing your feelings to someone when you know that they'll never give them back to you?"_

He wiped his face on his sleeve. He couldn't break down now. He was stronger than this. He was better than this.

He should just forget Mikasa. Give up on her. Live his own life.

But it was too much for him. He couldn't bear to see her cry. When she was hurt, he was hurt.

He gritted his teeth. It didn't matter if she didn't care about him.

He'd always do his best to make sure she was happy.

Even if he had to rely on someone he absolutely resented.

* * *

Eren grabbed his hair in frustration. He had always known that he was a loose cannon. But this time, he'd overdone it.

 _"I wish I hadn't saved you that day!"_

He ground his teeth together. He was stupid! How in the world had he expected her to understand him when he had said it that way.

Of course Eren would have saved her if he had to do it again! He had meant to say something else.

But now, she was gone. She had dashed into the woods and Jean had taken off after her.

Eren cursed himself. After all the times she had protected him, this was how he payed her back. By being harsh to her. Again and again.

He stood up, his food lying unfinished on the table. He couldn't possibly eat. Not after he had said all that.

How had it started?

The reason was so trivial, he couldn't even remember it. But it had turned into an argument. In the end, Eren had grown so furious that he had forgotten who he was. And done something horrible. Said something he never should have said.

He wondered if Mikasa would ever forgive him.

Something would always pop up between them from time to time. And mostly, it would be Eren's fault. Because he lost control over himself whenever he thought about it. How Mikasa was better than him in _everything._ How she was being pulled down by him because he was a loser.

Eren would only realize that he'd said something wrong when it was too late. And it would be useless then. His pride wouldn't allow him to stoop to that level, wouldn't allow him to apologize to her.

He shook his head. She would be alright. She was one of the best soldier in the survey corps after all. She had nerves of steel. She'd be back to normal, next thing in the morning.

While he was thinking about all this, something hard collided with the side of his head, knocking him back.

Eren crashed hard into the ground. He clutched his temples and groaned. He looked up to see a livid Jean in front of him, shaking so badly that it was difficult for him to stand, his ash-brown hair drooping over his eyes. He looked demented.

"You fucking bastard..." He growled.

He pounced on Eren and they rolled around, struggling with each other.

"What the hell is wrong with you, horse-face!" Eren yelled at him.

Jean didn't reply. He continued to struggle against Eren, despite the fact that he was clearly in the disadvantageous position.

Eren tried to subdue him, bringing an arm around 's neck and restraining him from behind.

Jean fought back violently, but there was nothing he could do. He slowed down as Eren tightened his hold on him.

And then they broke apart. Eren scrambled away from him. He was panting heavily.

"What in the world is your problem, Kirstein!" He hissed.

Jean snarled at him. "Yeager" He growled. "You're the most selfish person I've ever known."

Eren felt anger boiling in his stomach.

"Wh-What are you talking about?"

Jean scoffed. "To think.. that an undeserving bastard like you would get all the luck in the world."

Eren showed no signs of comprehension. What was he talking about?

"Having the best person possible in your life. And you're still not happy."

Eren frowned.

"Jean.. who are you-"

"Shut up, Bastard! Don't act like you don't know her. She's been running after you your whole life, hasn't she?"

It was as if someone had struck a match in the darkness.

Eren snarled at him. "This is between me and her. You stay _out_ of it."

Jean walked up to him.

"And then? You'll scream at her again? Make her feel like the world doesn't need her?"

Eren balled his fists. Jean was making him angry, and yet there was a small voice inside his head which was making him doubt himself.

"Do you know what she was doing in the woods?" Jean whispered. "She was punishing _herself._ Even though you were the one who made the mistake.

Eren felt bile rise in his throat. "Punishing _herself?"_

 _"Yes_. Physically hurting herself. And she was crying her eyes out."

Eren's arms were trembling. _Mikasa was crying..._

"But She- She's so... strong."

Jean spat on the ground. "She just acts like that Yeager. You're too dense to see it. She's a girl after all. Not some sort of animal. But I don't think you would be bothered. You treat her like she is one anyway."

Eren's whole body became rigid.

" _Shut up."_

 _"_ You can keep blaming her for every problem you face. I'm sure she'll accept anyway. She doesn't want her _little brother_ to be hurt."

Eren was shaking now. He stared at the ground. It couldn't be true, could it? He wasn't that cruel was he?

" _Shut up, Jean."_

His vision blurred. It was as if his surroundings had changed completely. The whole world was shaking. And the one he was facing wasn't Jean himself, but his own inner demons.

 _"Just do her a favour and ask her to kill herself. She'd probably do it without hesitating. Oh wait, you tried to kill her already!"_

 _Eren's face contorted. He dropped to the ground._

 _"After all, You've never bothered about her, have you. Her dreams, her happiness- they're non-existent to you aren't they? All you care about is yourself. Your own selfish ambitions."_

 _Eren scrambled away from him._

 _"No..." He whispered. "Please..."_

 _The demon walked closer to him. "Those two men..."_

 _Eren's heart was thumping rapidly_

 _"..those two men you killed that night..."_

 _He dug his nails into his skin, hoping that the pain would distract him. But it didn't help._

 _"..those two men... You're no better than them."_

 _Lightening crackled in the sky. Eren's screams were drowned by the wailing of restless spirits. The ground beneath him gave way.  
_

 _He felt himself falling... falling into an abyss from which he could never return.  
_

And then, he was no longer in hell. He could feel the soft, wet grass below him. Jean was gone.

It had started too rain.

He lay there alone. Immersed in thought.

He had never felt so disappointed in himself. He'd never felt so unworthy of calling himself a human being.

His tears merged with the raindrops and trailed down his face.

 _'What have I done to her?"_

' _How can I possibly face her after all this.'_

But he had too. He had to tell her how sorry he was. He had to tell her that he needed her, that she was important to him.

He sprinted into the woods.

* * *

The trees loomed over him, and the little moonlight which filtered through was barely sufficient to help him see.

Eren was searching for her frantically.

 _'She couldn't possibly have gone back to her room again. I'm sure I would have spotted her on the way.'_

He yelled her name at the top of his lungs. Several times. But to no avail.

He felt defeated.

 _'This is all my fault. It's my responsibility to set things right.'_

He raced past the trees, looking everywhere.

And then he slipped on a root, launching him a few meters ahead. He slammed face-first into the ground.

He dug his hands into the dirt.

' _I have to find her.'_

And then, the rain slowed down.

Eren got up. His eyes widened.

There, in a patch of moonlight, lay Mikasa. Her hair snaking across her face in thin strands. Her eyes closed. Her lips partially open.

Eren slowly walked up to her.

 _'Mikasa...'_

He knelt down and stared at her face. Her chest was heaving rhythmically and Eren could hear the soft sighs which escaped from her mouth every once and a while.

There they were. Two people, together in absolute silence- Their hearts reaching out to each other.

Eren felt relieved. She wasn't hurt. Just seriously exhausted.

He held her hands in his. And stared at her.

He felt something wet and sticky.

He turned her hands around. The knuckles on one of her fist were bloody.

 _'She was punishing herself. Even though you were the one who made the mistake.'_

Eren grimaced.

"Why?.. "

He was shaking now. Shaking with suppressed emotions.

"Mikasa... why do I always end up hurting you in the end.?

Mikasa didn't respond. She was unconscious after all.

Eren took off his jacket and draped it over her, trying to shield her from the rain and the cold.

He sighed and picked her up.

Her arms and legs dangled lifelessly as he held her- one arm under her back and another one supporting her thighs.

She was heavy. But not as heavy as he would have expected her to be.

He felt relieved that he could, at least, carry her. Just like when they were small.

' _Now, now Eren.. don't feel to happy.'_ He chided himself. This was probably the last time he would get to do something like this. Mikasa probably wouldn't let him touch her after all that crap he'd said.

 _'Then again. She's not a sick bastard like I am.'_

He felt so helpless.

' _I dragged her into this whole mess. It's because of me that she's now stuck with the survey corps.'_

He shook his head violently, pushing all stray thoughts out of his head.

"Come on, Mikasa... let's take you to your room."

He turned around and walked away into the distance.

* * *

 **End of the first part. So... how was it? This is my first time writing something in this sort of genre so I'd really be happy if someone could give me tips on improving my writing style.**

 **I'll probably be posting the next chapter some time next week.  
**


	2. Hidden Feelings

**Our Hearts Beat For Each Other:**

 **A/N: Wow! I'm pretty glad that a few of you actually liked the story. I'd like to thank everyone for their support. Here's the next chapter, but beware. This one has a few intimate scenes which I simply couldn't help adding. :)  
**

 **On with the story.**

* * *

 **Chapter-2:**

 **Hidden Feelings  
**

Eren kept walking. The rain had stopped now, making things a bit easier for him.

He looked down at Mikasa. He'd always pictured something like this before. He'd always hoped that one day, he'd get to help her, to protect her.

And yet all he felt was guilt.

Jean's words still rang in his ears..

 _'She's been running after you your whole life, hasn't she?'_

And it was true. Every word of it. He'd been so obsessed with getting revenge for his mother, so keen to prove himself, that he had left her in the dust- to clean up after him.

He cursed himself. How could he have been so stupid? He'd always scolded her for treating him like a child. But the truth was that he was already acting like one. Getting into fights whenever he felt like it. Taking risks without bothering about the consequences. And he'd blamed all of it on her.

And the worst part was that she had never said something harsh in return. She had always remained calm and cool, no matter what he said.

That was why Eren had said the blasted thing in the first place. Of course, he had phrased it poorly, but he hadn't meant that he would have just left her there with those two heartless swines to die.

What he had actually wanted to say was that he had wished that the whole situation had never come up in the first place. Because now, Mikasa felt indebted to him, and their relationship with each other would never be the same. She'd always end up following him blindly, not caring about her self.

Eren wanted Mikasa to be with him. But he wanted her to be with him because of who he was, and not because he'd happened to save her that night.

He sighed and stared at her face. She looked so... peaceful when she was unconscious. Usually, she'd always have that sad look on her face, and no one could do anything to cheer her up. But now, she was like a normal person. A person who didn't have to deal with so many problems. A person who could afford to smile.

Mikasa stirred. She didn't open her eyes, but she brought her hands up and placed them behind Eren's neck. Slowly, she started to play with his hair and stroke his skin. Eren felt his neck tingle where her fingers touched him. It was an amazing sensation. And it made Eren feel happy, even at a time like this.

He had never really thought about it before, but Mikasa was... pretty. Beautiful even. Eren watched her, entranced by the way her hair fluttered in the wind.

He shook his head violently. What was happening to him? Why was he feeling so strange all of a sudden? She was his sister. What would she say if she found out that he was thinking about things like this, especially after he had been so mean to her.

But then Mikasa lurched forward. She brought her hands back, gripped the front of Eren's shirt and buried her face into it.

And Eren froze. He could feel her nose and forehead rubbing against his chest. She exhaled into him.

Something inside Eren shattered. He nearly dropped Mikasa.

 _'What is she doing?'_

It was as if something which had stayed dormant inside him had suddenly been unleashed. Thoughts flooded into his mind and it was as if his whole world had turned upside down. Something was clawing at him from the inside, trying it's best to escape, fighting for its freedom.

His heart was beating violently against his chest. So violently, that he was afraid it would wake her up. He was sweating profusely.

Mikasa's features suddenly seemed crystal clear to him. Her ears, her perfect nose, her raised cheek bones.

And her delicate, cherry-red lips. Her lips that beckoned to him, drawing him towards her.

Eren was trembling now.

Mikasa suddenly weighed a ton.

 _'What is happening to me?'_

* * *

 _Jean ran through the woods, unable to find a way out._

 _He dashed past the gigantic trees, jumping over the small obstacles that got in his way._

 _He didn't know if he was chasing someone or if he was the one who was being hunted down._

 _All he knew was that he had to keep running. Running till he'd pushed himself to the limit. Running, so that he could leave his pain behind._

 _But then he tripped over a gnarled root and landed face-first in the mud. He lay on the ground, panting heavily, gasping for breath.  
_

 _He gazed ahead and saw someone's boots sinking into the wet mud, a few inches away from him. He looked up and barely restrained himself from screaming._

 _It was Mikasa. But she was different. Her eyes flashed maliciously. The smile she was giving him was a harsh, evil one._

 _"Look who's here!" She whispered. "Our little knight in armor!"_

 _Jean tried to get up, but she raised her foot and smashed it into the back of his skull._

 _Jean choked on the dirt. He didn't know what was worse. The pain in his head, or the agony in his heart._

 _"I found it amusing..." She purred. "How you tried so hard... so hard to be as good as him."_

 _And then from the corner of his eye, Jean could see Eren leaning against a tree, a wicked grin on his face._

 _Jean struggled even harder. He couldn't let Eren see him in this pitiable state. But Mikasa was strong, and she stomped down even harder, making Jean grimace in pain._

 _"Your half- hearted attempts to save me make me laugh." She confessed. "You tried so hard to be better than him, but he was always one step ahead of you."_

 _Jean stayed silent. He knew it was true. Eren had managed to outclass him in everything, no matter how hard he tried.  
_

 _"But Mikasa! He's your hero isn't he?" Eren exclaimed mockingly. "He saved you before and almost ended up killing himself in the process, didn't he?"  
_

 _Mikasa giggled, grinding her boot harder on Jean's head. "Him? He's a joke! It would have been much more entertaining if he just died trying. Isn't that right, Jean?"_

 _Jean stared at her. He felt like his heart had shattered into a million pieces._

 _What had he ever done to deserve something like this? He only wanted her to be happy. He wasn't exactly a saint, but he hadn't really hurt anyone either. Was this really what she thought of him? Was he no more to her than an annoyance, a mosquito which she wanted to swat away?  
_

 _They both stared at Jean and laughed. Laughed at his helpless form which lay on the floor.  
_

 _And he hated it. Hated it, hated it, hated it!_

 _Mikasa stepped away from him. She knelt down, cupped a hand to his chin and forced him to look in to her eyes._

 _"Now, Jean. I'd like to hear it from you."_

 _Jean blinked at her, but didn't respond._

 _"I want you..." said Mikasa, stressing every syllable, "...to admit that Eren's better than you."_

 _Jean looked into her eyes, her eyes which held absolutely no sympathy for him. Those bottomless pits which were trying to suck him in.  
_

 _"N..Never" he whispered._

 _Mikasa shrugged. She walked back to Eren and they held each other in a tight embrace. Eren placed a hand behind her head and another around her waist. He looked at Jean and smirked at his pained expres_ sion.

 _"You're jealous, Aren't you?" He asked Jean._

 _Jean slowly got up. He balled his hands into fists._

 _"Stop it." He murmured._

 _Mikasa turned to him._

 _"Really? You're going to stop us? You are nothing."_

 _Jean raised his hands towards her._

 _"No more..." He whispered._

 _He could feel his blood flowing faster and faster._

 _"NO MORE!"_

 _And suddenly, the whole world started shaking._

 _Pieces of the earth collapsed inwards. The trees shook and fell._

 _And past those trees, Jean could still see them embracing each other as if nothing else mattered in the world. As if he didn't matter._

 _And then the ground beneath him gave way and he found himself falling... in to the depths of hell._

* * *

Jean was safely tucked into his bed.

He lay panting.

 _'Another dream...'_

His face contorted. Dreams sometimes told the truth. And his case, he was sure of it.

Screw the world. Screw them all.

If Jean couldn't face them, he would just have to avoid them.

Forever if he had to.

* * *

Eren finally burst into the room. He gently lowered her down to the bed and sat down in a corner, rubbing his hands vigorously, trying to generate some heat.

He was wet. And so was she. But for now, she was safe.

Eren stared at her for a second before realizing something.

"Oh..."

If he left her like this, she'd probably get a bad, bad cold.

Eren sighed. He really wished he'd tried to learn something useful from his mother when he had the chance. He had no idea about the things a person was supposed to do while he was taking care of a... girl.

He felt a bitter taste in his mouth when he realized that things would have been much better if _she_ was taking care of him.

But Eren stopped himself, restraining his rage. He needed to control himself. For her sake. For the sake of the person who was stupid enough to do anything for him without giving it a second thought.

How he wished that Mikasa would have slapped him at least once in his whole miserable life. That would probably have put Eren in his place.

But she probably wouldn't even dream about it.

He stared at her damp hair and had a revelation.

 _'I need to dry her off.'_

Eren stood up, walked away and returned with a towel he'd grabbed from the bathroom.

He sat at the head of her bed. He looked at her and found his heart throbbing.

 _Why wouldn't it slow down?_

He looked away.

Then he cursed himself. He couldn't waste time like this! He needed to be strong.

He brushed her hair away so he could get a clear view of her face.

The stains left on her cheeks by her tears made him flinch.

 _'I did that to her.'_

He tried to wipe them away with a corner of the towel.

And then, things became worse.

 _Why were her cheeks so soft?_

It must definitely be his imagination. He carefully proceeded to poke and prod them, and it felt like he was touching a slab of hot, melting butter.

Yep. He was definitely losing it.

And suddenly, a weird suggestion, a ghost of an idea, rose from the depths of his mind.

 _How would her cheeks feel against his._

The next moment, he was leaning downwards, towards her.

He paused. Should he really do it? Should he risk it?

But he couldn't stop now, when she was so close.

He brought his face forward, sinking his chin into her shoulder.

He took a deep breath and pressed his cheeks into hers.

It was nearly impossible to describe what he felt next. Tendrils of electricity snaked through him from the point of contact. Whenever she inhaled, her cheeks expanded a bit, and Eren could literally feel it. She was delicate, like a gentle breeze. He felt cold where he was touching her, but the rest of his body was burning. Every little sound she made echoed through his entire body. At that moment, he knew what was going on. They were connected.

Mikasa purred into his ear, as if she was subconsciously enjoying it too. Eren even thought he heard her whisper his name.

But that wasn't possible. It was probably just his imagination.

He pulled away, and took in large gulps of air. He closed his eyes, hoping that the feeling would stay with him for some time before fading away.

He blinked, trying to dispel his wooziness and clapped his face with his hands.

Once again, Eren was in the world of the living. He used the towel and moved it around her face.

He tried his best to ignore the small bumps he felt when the towel went over her nose and her lips.

He brought the towel away and proceeded to admire his work. In his opinion, he'd done a pretty good job.

Now to take care of her hair.

Eren thought for a moment. Then he proceeded to fold the towel in half.

He snuck a hand under the back of her head and gently lifted it, while using his other hand to slide the towel underneath it.

He let her head drop on to the folded towel.

He then lifted both the corners and raised them.

 _'Alright. Time to start rubbing!'_

And suddenly, he felt a powerful grip on his hands. A grip which was so strong, it hurt.

He looked down into the eyes of Mikasa Ackerman, who was now awake.

"Eren.." She whispered, her brows furrowed."...what are you _doing_?"

* * *

 **Whew! I swear I nearly fainted while writing this. This whole romance thingy is pretty draining. But I think it came out well. Once again, I'd like to thank everyone for the positive feedback.  
**

 **See you in the next chapter!**


	3. The Truth

**Our Hearts Beat For Each other:**

 **Man! I am so psyched about the feedback for this story. Thanks everyone! I always find it entertaining to read all of your reviews. Please don't stop!**

 **Here's the next chapter, with more romance and less angst.**

 **A lot of T rated stuff here. Kids, no peeking!**

 **Chapter-3:**

 **The Truth**

* * *

And suddenly, Eren felt a powerful grip on his hands. A grip which was so strong, it hurt.

He looked down into the eyes of Mikasa Ackerman, who was now awake.

"Eren.." She whispered, her brows furrowed."...what are you _doing_?"

Eren suddenly noticed a lot of things.

The first was the most obvious. His sister was awake.

Secondly, his sister was staring at him as if he'd done something weird, which indeed he had.

Third, he was on top of his sister, both legs on either side of her.

When Eren noticed this, he immediately let out a strangled yelp and fell off the bed, smacking his head.

Mikasa sat up, alarmed.

"Eren! Are you alright!"

"Y-Yeah I'm fine!" Eren stuttered. He cursed himself. How could he have been so careless? And why hadn't he noticed that he'd been sitting on top of her like that? Man, he wanted to smack his face.

Mikasa tried to stand up, but Eren grabbed her arm.

"It's alright." He whispered. "I'm fine."

For a second, Mikasa seemed ok. Then her eyes welled with tears. She scooted away from Eren to the other side of the bed.

Eren sighed. She'd probably remembered what he'd said to her before.

He winced. He was such a monster.

"I'm sorry..." Mikasa sniffed.

Eren frowned.

" _You're sorry?"_

Mikasa nodded. "I'm always slowing you down... Always getting in your way..."

Eren felt guilt flood into his heart. After all that he'd done, she was blaming herself?

"Mikasa..."

"I- I just want to p-protect you, E-Eren." She sobbed. "But you won't let me..."

"Mikasa.. It's not your-"

"Sometimes, I wish I was never born. That way I'd never have caused you any trouble."

Eren's heart was growing heavier and heavier. He couldn't hear anymore.

"Mikasa!" He said firmly.

Mikasa stared at him blankly. "What?"

Eren stood up and grabbed the towel.

"Turn around."

Mikasa blinked.

"I said _turn around_." Eren repeated.

Mikasa looked into his eyes for a moment before nodding.

She turned around, curious to know what he was planning to do.

She stared at the wall, a slight scowl on her face.

' _Did I do_ _something to upset him again?"_

The next moment, Eren had thrown the towel above her head and was rubbing furiously.

Mikasa was stunned for a second, too disoriented to react. What was he trying to do?

Eren yanked the towel away and Mikasa's hair fell back in a disheveled mess over her face.

She stood there for a moment, staring at him.

Then it hit her.

"Eren... were you _drying_ my hair?"

Eren grinned broadly. "Yep."

His face turned serious.

"After all..." He muttered darkly "You thought it was a good idea to soak yourself in the rain in a place where no one could find you..."

Mikasa blushed.

She gazed at those warm green eyes.

Then something else crept into her mind.

"Eren, how did I get here?"

Eren didn't respond.

"Eren...are you listening?"

Eren perked up.

"Oh... by the way" He announced. "We've got combat practice in the morning tomorrow."

Mikasa frowned at him. "I know. I was the one who told you."

Eren blinked. "Oh..yeah." He turned around and fiddled with his shirt.

And at that moment, Mikasa realized what had happened. Her cheeks turned a deep shade of pink.

"E-Eren.. " She choked. "D-did you-"

"Yeah.." Eren sighed. "I did."

She felt her eyes grow wet, but not because she was sad. In fact, she was very happy. Eren had taken care of her. He'd carried her all the way here, and he'd even dried her hair for her. He'd been _nice_ to her.

 _'When was the last time he had done something like that?'_

 _'Well, it had to be sometime before they had joined the trainee squad.'_

She smiled as she remembered those days. Eren would always be nice to her. He'd sneak up to her bed and stay with her during the night so that she wouldn't feel lonely. And it really helped. It made her feel like she was needed.

Why had it stopped? Why had it changed?

Mikasa's feelings for Eren had only grown in intensity since then. She'd become more and more attached to him, and he'd become more distant from her.

"Eren.." She whispered. "You didn't have to do all of that."

Eren chuckled nervously. "Of course I had to! We're brother and sister after all!"

Mikasa's heart sank. Did he really feel that way?

"..or maybe not... " Eren corrected himself.

Mikasa frowned. She didn't know if this was good news or bad news. She wondered why Eren was so... different today.

Eren cleared his throat.

"Ahem.." He announced. "You're looking pretty tired today...so just sit back and relax. I'll take care of everything else."

Mikasa felt bile rise in her throat.

"No..." She said firmly. "I'm fine. _I_ can take care of everything. You should return to your room and sleep."

Eren bowed his head down, his hair drooping over his eyes.

For a moment, he didn't say anything.

Then he sighed.

"Are you so eager to kick me out of your room, Mikasa?"

Mikasa was stunned. He wanted to stay with her? Why? Didn't he hate her for what she had done to him.

"Besides..." Eren continued. "Y-you've hurt your arm pretty bad. You'll find it difficult to use it."

Mikasa frowned. It wasn't like Eren to make lame excuses about something like this.

She stared at the knuckles of her right hand and her eyes widened. Someone had wrapped a green cloth around them.

She turned to Eren and noticed that his cape looked like someone had torn a chunk out of it.

' _Eren...'_

Her heart warmed to him. She wanted to hug him. She wanted to embrace him so bad, it hurt.

He wasn't the one who was moving away from her. She had been moving away from _him._

She'd never accepted his help when he'd offered. She had always tried her best to solve matters on her own.

Only now, Mikasa understood the truth.

She hadn't just fooled the others into thinking that she was an empty shell. She'd fooled herself too.

Mikasa wanted someone to help her. Eren wanted to protect her. Then why weren't things working out?

She watched Eren pull her boots off and drop them to the floor. And it made her blush even harder. When she looked at him, she noticed that he was red in the face as well.

She stared at him in awe.

"That feels better, doesn't it?" Eren asked her.

Mikasa nodded, a bit shy. It did feel a bit better without those stuffy boots.

She lay down in her bed, thoughts racing through her head.

He pulled a blanket over her. She gripped the covers, thankful for the warmth.

 _'What's gotten into Eren?'_ She wondered.

He was being too nice to her. It wasn't normal. And now, she was really concerned about him.

She watched him pace across the room restlessly, hugging himself.

He was shivering.

She stared at him.

"Eren... you're feeling cold too, right? Get in."

Eren shook his head, giving her a nervous smile.

"N-no! Of course not!"

Mikasa frowned at him. "Why not? You used to do it when we were younger..."

"But, we're not kids anymore. What will the others think?"

Mikasa smiled at him warmly.

"Eren.." She said. "You don't need to worry about the others. To me, you'll always be that brave, kind boy who'd make me feel safe even when I had those horrible nightmares. I'll never think of you as anyone else."

Eren glared at her and Mikasa could swear that she saw something weird in his eyes. Something like pain.

Eren turned and placed his hand against the wall. He was breathing heavily. Mikasa could see his shoulders vacillating, moving up and down.

Then, he pulled his head back and smashed into the wall.

* * *

Eren felt his head throbbing, but he relished the pain. It helped him ignore the piercing feeling he had in his chest.

She really thought of him like that? She still thought of him as the guy who had saved her that day?

Eren couldn't bear it anymore. There was so much he owed Mikasa. He wanted to tell her the truth. He wanted to tell her that he was grateful that she was by his side. But he didn't know how.

The ringing in his ears drowned out Mikasa's cries of dismay and her anxious inquiries about him being alright.

He slid to the ground, forehead resting against the wall.

Slowly, he turned around and looked up. Mikasa was staring down at him, her eyes shimmering with tears.

"W-why are y-you hurting yourself, Eren?" She sobbed. "It won't make me feel better."

Eren gazed at her. Her face was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"Mikasa, I'm sorry..." He whispered.

Mikasa looked at him blankly.

"What for?"

"For everything." Eren replied.

For a second, she held his gaze. Then she stepped forward, and brought his head to her waist, embracing him.

"Eren... it's not your fault. Stop blaming yourself."

Eren paused for a second, then chuckled. "You too."

Mikasa blinked. "Me?"

Eren smiled at her. "Yeah. The two of us need to stop worrying about the past and focus on the future."

Mikasa held him even closer. She smelled like his mom. Eren felt his eyes grow wet.

All of that had been taken from him. His parents, his friends, his life...

But he had to let it go. He had to stay alive for _her_ sake.

"I-I don't think I understand..." She stuttered.

Eren inhaled and took in her scent once more.

"All I'm trying to say is.. maybe you should think about yourself sometimes."

A pause.

"Myself?"

Eren nodded. "I've been following my dreams till now, and I think I'd like to know yours. Is there something you've always wanted? Can I help you find it?"

Mikasa's arms tightened painfully around his head. Her breathing was erratic and Eren could feel her stomach contract,

"No..." She said at last.

Eren frowned. That wasn't right! There must be something which she really wants!

He took a deep breath.

"Mikasa.. It's alright. You can tell me..."

"There's nothing..." She insisted, tears seeping from the corners of her eyes.

Eren's eyes narrowed.

"Are you sure?"

Mikasa's grip on him grew even tighter, making Eren wince. He knew it wasn't her intention to hurt him, but her arms felt like iron clamps.

He was sure now, that something was seriously bothering her. It made sense. After all, how was it that the prodigy 'Mikasa Ackerman' was crying like a little girl in front of him?

He squinted at her.

"Mikasa, are you hiding things from me?"

Mikasa shook her head violently.

Eren was worried now. Mikasa had definitely lost her cool.

"Mikasa..." He croaked. "I want to help you. I really do..."

Mikasa didn't respond. Eren bit his lip in frustration. Why was she acting like this. He'd never thought that she'd keep secrets from him.

"Mikasa...please..." He begged her.

Mikasa was trembling badly now.

"I-I can't."

"Why?"

"B-Because y-you might not l-like it."

Eren knew what he had to do. He had to give her confidence. He had to make sure that she understood that she could trust him.

"Mikasa, I won't get angry." He whispered to her.

Mikasa ran her hands through his hair.

She inhaled sharply, trying to calm down. Eren could almost hear the gears grinding in her head.

"Promise?"

Eren nodded. He'd do whatever he could to make sure that she was happy.

...

Mikasa's grip on Eren's head loosened. Slowly, She slid down to her knees so that their faces were level.

She had to do it. She had to tell him. It was now or never. If she kept her feelings inside her any longer, she would explode.

 _'But what if he doesn't feel that way?'_

She had never hesitated in believing it when she was a child. But so much time had passed since then.

The seeds of doubt were first sowed in her mind when she'd seen him train with Annie.

Mikasa had secretly hated her from the start. And when Eren had started spending more time with her, things had only become worse.

The worst part was that Mikasa _knew_ that she was a better fighter than Annie. She could have easily helped train Eren in her place.

But he'd obstinately refused, preferring to avoid her instead.

Mikasa had been in Eren's life ever since he'd saved her that night. And when the Titan's had attacked and Eren had lost his family, Mikasa had been forced to abandon her role as the one who admired him so much and take up the mantle of his overprotective parents.

What if he still thought of her like that? What if she was still like a mother to him? What if he was unwilling to accept her?

But she set her jaw firmly. Whatever be the case, She'd find out now. She was tired of hiding things from Eren. If he was happy, She'd be relieved of her burden. If he wasn't... then Mikasa's worst fears would be confirmed. Either way, she'd have to tell him.

Before she was torn apart from the inside.

...

Eren remained silent, unwilling to disturb Mikasa's thoughts.

He knew that she was on the edge and that all he needed was a bit of tweaking to make her spill the beans.

Then Mikasa looked at him again. This time, he could see a steely resolve in her black eyes.

"Close your eyes." She said.

Eren frowned. "But-"

"You said you would help me, wouldn't you?"

Eren bit his lip. How could closing his eyes possibly help her?

But somehow, he couldn't find the strength or energy to argue.

He obliged, shutting his eyes and drowning himself in darkness, leaving the rest upto his imagination to fill in.

He felt Mikasa move forward. She nibbled at his ear.

He heard her voice firm and clear.

"The thing I desire the most... is you, Eren."

Eren felt his heart beating faster and faster.

Something, incredibly soft and moist, moved across his skin and settled on his forehead. He could feel someone blowing gently at the bruise he'd gotten there when he banged his head into the wall. The thing caressed his forehead before sliding downwards, over his nose and it stopped at the tip, leaving a moist trail in it's wake.

Then it retracted a bit and he could feel it hovering a few inches above his lips. He could literally _taste_ Mikasa's breath.

He imagined that she was hesitating, worrying about how he would react. But he knew that he wanted this. He wanted to be closer to her.

He brought his hands to her shoulders and gave them a reassuring squeeze.

He felt the softness grazing his lips. Tentatively at first, then once again, more firm this time.

Then Mikasa put a hand behind his head and pushed him towards her.

Eren's eyes shot open and he stared into her's. There was something about them which made them look tender and yet they burned with fiery passion.

Her lips were on his and there was nothing else in the world Eren was bothered about.

They stayed like that for a moment, then broke away reluctantly.

The two of them were breathing heavily.

Eren stared at Mikasa, a wondrous expression on his face. He brought his hand up to his lips where she'd kissed him.

"All this time, Mika..." He whispered.

Mikasa gave him a teary smile. "Always."

Eren's breathing was back to normal.

"But... But I never imagined..."

Mikasa shivered. "I'm sorry... I shouldn't have done that. I-"

But Eren lurched forward, held her face in his hands and kissed her again.

He'd never imagined he'd ever feel something so amazing. He felt as if his whole body had been paralyzed. Why had he never realized it? The happiness he had been struggling to find so long was within his grasp. It had _always_ been within his grasp.

He pulled back and used his thumbs to wipe the tears from her face.

"I feel the same way too.." He murmured.

And she smiled once again. And Eren felt happy.

"I always found it tough to accept it, you know.." He muttered. "How you seemed to be better than me in everything. And I think I know why... I think it was because I was afraid that I wasn't good enough for you. And even now, I still feel like that..."

He felt Mikasa's fingers dig deep into his arms.

"I don't care!" She hissed fiercely. "I don't care if you think like that!"

Eren was taken aback.

"Mikasa.."

"It's not about which one of us is better! Our hearts beat for each other, and that's all that matters!"

Eren felt as if a huge burden had been lifted of his shoulders.

He didn't have to push her away. He didn't have to be her hero. They were _made_ this way. They didn't have to fight to stay together.

He watched Mikasa stroke his cheek. She was talking to him, but Eren wasn't listening. He simply focused on her tone.

Eren's thoughts were crystal clear. The Titans needed to be destroyed. They needed to recover Wall Maria. They needed to restore Humanity.

Their paths were filled with life-threatening hurdles. The two of them would constantly find themselves on the verge of death.

But they _would_ survive.

Because they _had_ too.

Eren was confident. He felt like he could do anything. Mikasa was _his._

And nothing would stand between them.

But as Eren watched Mikasa, he suddenly felt dark voices whispering in his head.

Nothing but _him._

* * *

 **Whew! I'm glad it's done. This was seriously giving me headaches. Well, what do you readers think?  
**

 **Well, We'll be seeing more of Jean in the next chapter.**

 **Till then, Adios!**


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